The Last Straw
by L.e.o.n.a.r.d.o.TMNT
Summary: After everything he's been through, Leo has developed PTSD. How will his family deal with it all? Rated M.
1. The Last Straw

This is rated M for violence, slight swearing, and character death. There is also mentioned Don/Raph and a bit more of Leo/Mikey, but it is by no means explicit. It is just more blatantly shown.  
This takes place after Exodus. It is much darker than the show. Which I love.  
This was also sort of 'inspired' by the word 'rope'. I borrowed some prompts from multiple tables online.  
And the layout of the house and area around it may be off, but it's fanfiction. I'm not perfect.

They were battered, they were bruised. And at this point, they were pretty much beaten. The Shredder had finally been removed from their lives by the Utroms, but at what price? Master Splinter had been brutally murdered by the Shredder. Michelangelo had 2 broken legs, Donatello had a broken left arm. Raphael had multiple fractures in many bones in his torso, making movement near impossible and horribly painful. Leonardo, aside from having a horrific stab wound and multiple other injuries, had a broken spirit.

He blamed everything on himself. If he had only been quicker to help his master, he would not be buried in the ground right now. If he had quicker reactions, he would not have been stabbed by Karai. He should have been able to protect his family. But his weakness, his _failure_, had cost the brothers very much.

The Turtles had been delivered by the Utroms to Casey's old farmhouse to recuperate from their injuries. Upon arrival, Casey and April were both shocked to see their friends. The Utroms had contacted them, but spared them the details. Those were quickly evident when the heavily-bandaged turtles appeared without their sensei.

Raphael had instantly been grounded to the spare bedroom. Casey had actually brought extra mattresses from both his and April's homes to accommodate everyone. Mikey was supposed to be grounded as well, seeing as how he couldn't walk that well, but he found ways around it. Walking for Raphael was painful, but it was only difficult for Mikey.

Donatello was not grounded anywhere, seeing as how he only had a single fracture in one arm. Therefore, he tended to stay with April and Casey, checking in on his other brothers to make sure they weren't killing each other over silly things.

Leonardo was a different story. The others were saddened by their experience, but they were dealing. Raphael and Mikey were restrained to the same room, and their antics kept each other entertained easily. Donatello also visited Raphael often, helping Mikey to a different room for up to an hour at a time. Both of them were, to say the least, thankful for each other's embrace.

Of course, Leo was not alone. He did have Mikey. All of his humor, however, had little effect on the stone cold leader. He spent most days either in meditation in the barn loft or staring out the window of the spare bedroom. His stab had not been fatal, or even that horrific. Don and April patched it up easily, though a jagged scar remained on his side. The Shredder had also ripped off a chunk of his shell. Leo would forever be disfigured because of the battle, but he took it as his due for allowing harm to come to his family.

Leo was alone at the moment in the barn. He was on the main floor, training again. He wasn't supposed to, because he could loosen his stitching, but he paid that no heed. Only when he sensed a presence did he stop. His eyes darted to the door where the unmistakable figure of Michelangelo stood, leaning heavily against his crutches. He hobbled into the barn, stopping about a foot from his leader. His eyes were not as joking when they were alone, his mouth not so loud.

"Leo, man, you need to stop training so much… You're going to injure yourself again…" He gently laid a hand on his brother's chest, rubbing his thumb in a circle to try and relax him. Leonardo shut his eyes, his breathing heavy as he stepped forward to hug his brother.

"Mikey. It was my lack of training that… that killed Sensei. That injured my family." He pulled back, staring into Michelangelo's bright blue eyes with his own hazel ones. "You have two broken legs, for Christ's sake, Mikey!" He moved back from his brother, averting his gaze. Mikey, however, had other ideas.

He hobbled forward once more, reaching out his left hand for Leo's face. Gently but firmly, he turned his brother's face towards him. Before Leo could protest, he leaned forward to kiss him gently. Leo barely reacted, pulling back after only a moment. "I'm not letting you get hurt again, Mikey." With that, Leo turned back to his training. A sad sigh escaped the youngest brother as he turned back for the house, sincerely hoping that the other two were done so he could get into the room.

As night fell, Leo returned to the house. The rest of the family was sitting down to a wonderful dinner that was prepared by Donnie and April. As the door opened, everyone turned their eyes expectantly towards Leo. He didn't meet their gaze as he walked to the stairs, obviously favoring his right side. Donnie sighed.

"Leo, you're hurting yourself. Please, at least come eat a little then let me examine your wound." He patted the open seat between him and Mikey, a hopeful expression spreading to Mikey's face. A few seconds passed as Leo eyed his family before turning away and heading up the stairs without a word. A collective sigh passed around the table as they started dinner, again without their brother.

Once upstairs, Leo shut the door and walked slowly to the window. He rested his left arm and forehead against the cool glass, letting it calm him down from his earlier exercises. After a moment of reflection, he turned to his bed. Mikey and Raph both had slightly larger beds with tables near them, since they were the worst off. Don was sleeping on a futon, and Leo had his own small mattress in the corner, away from everyone else. He tromped towards it, taking off his gear and mask in the process. They were carefully laid to the side as he fell quickly into a fitful sleep.

Leo's eyes quickly darted back and forth, coming to rest on each member of his family. They were all calling out to him, each of them injured badly. Master Splinter lay burned beyond recognition, his feeble hand reaching out for his eldest son. Raphael was barely moving, a caring Donatello trying to protect his brother. Mikey was backed against the wall, the pain from his legs bringing tears to his eyes.

Leo stood, turning his eyes back towards the imminent threat- Karai. The sword-wielding daughter of the Shredder was looming over him, her eyes red with anger. "You are far too weak, Turtle. Your family is dying. I had hoped to kill you, but watching you suffer is much better…" She raised her sword, throwing it straight and true. The point of it embedded itself in his master's chest, causing him to cry out in pain before falling still. Her other sword was held in her hand as she leapt at Don and Raph, a single slice finishing them both off. She then turned to Leo knowingly. "First your father, then your brothers, then your lover. And you are too weak to do anything!"

Leo growled, taking a step forward. As he did, he felt something changing inside him. He glanced down at himself in shock. He was a Turtle tot again, barely able to hold his swords. He glanced back up just in time to see Karai drive her sword into Mikey's chest. She turned away from him, stalking slowly towards the last Turtle. "You are a weak, pathetic being Leonardo. I would have expected better. Your failure not only caused the Shredder to win, but now you are truly defeated." She raised her sword to strike him down, but at that moment he was awakened.

Donatello was leaning over him, his hand on his upper arm as he tried to wake his leader. The other two Turtles were both in bed, but their fearing eyes were also trained on Leo. He opened his eyes, instantly jumping back against the wall. He reached for his swords, but they weren't there. In a panic, he dove for Donnie, easily tackling him to the floor. Just as he moved his fist, he felt something hit his head. With a growl, he turned to see the Mikey had thrown a pillow at him.

It seemed to do the trick. Leo shook his head once before looking down at Donnie. His expression turned from anger to horror faster than any of them could blink, and he was instantly standing. He back away from his brothers, his shell coming to rest against the wall. "Don… Don, I… I don't know what…" He shook his head, angry at himself. Without another word, he opened the window and leapt out onto the roof.

Donatello slowly stood, walking to the window and glancing out. There was no sign of his older brother, but he knew he was still nearby. With a sad sigh, he walked to his futon and collapsed onto it. "Don…What the hell was that about?" Raph's deep voice rumbled from his mattress.

Mikey nodded. "Yeah, why did he go berserk all of a sudden?" His blue eyes were trained on Don. He had seen both Raph and Leo lose their temper before. Hell, Raph had almost beaten his head in with a pipe before. But he had never been so scared of any of his brothers before now.

Don shook his head. "I'm not too sure… From what I can tell, though, I think that Leo has PTSD." No voices answered him in the darkness, but he could tell that his brothers agreed with him. There was no other reason why he avoided them, why he pushed himself so hard. He was afraid of fearing, failing, remembering.

When he received no further answers, Donnie laid back down, seemingly asleep before his head even hit the pillow.

The next morning, Raphael was the first awake. His eyes first travelled to Donnie, a small smile appearing when he saw that he was still asleep. He had a dopey grin that he always wore when he slept, and it brought a light to Raph's heart. The next thing he noticed, however, made the smile fade away. Leo had not returned all night, as evidenced by the pile of his gear that remained on the floor by his messed up bed.

He sighed, managing to sit up with minimal groaning. He awakened Don, who also sat up. His eyes followed Raph's gaze, a sad sigh escaping him. He stood, walking towards Raph. A light tap from his hand awakened the youngest brother, who soon after struggled to his feet. Don managed to convince Raph to stay in bed for breakfast today, as he and Mikey traversed downstairs to the kitchen. They were greeted by the sight of April and Casey making breakfast.

"Mornin', guys. Is Raph not feeling well today?" Casey looked at the other two Turtles with concern. He liked them all dearly, but Raph was by far his best friend, almost his other half in a platonic way. Don walked over, shaking his head.

"No, he's fine. I just wanted to eat upstairs with him today. Mikey doesn't like to be cooped up though, so he's going to stay with you guys down here." He grabbed two plates, dishing up some breakfast for himself and Raph before heading back upstairs.

April turned to Mikey. "Is Leo coming down to breakfast at all?" Mikey shook his head.

"Last night… he kinda… Well, he lost it. Don tried to wake him up from an obvious nightmare. Leo leapt at him and would have punched his lights out if I hadn't thrown a pillow at him." He paused, letting what he said register with both April and her slower counterpart. "Don thinks he has PTSD. And me and Raph agree."

April hung her head as Mikey spoke. Their last encounter had been enough to even sober up Mikey. She didn't want to think about its repercussions on Leo, who was much more easily disturbed by things of this magnitude.

At that moment, Leo entered the bedroom. Don and Raph looked up as he did, Raph's eyes narrowing protectively. Even if he was disabled, he would not let Leo touch Don again. "What do you want, Leo?" he growled.

Leo ignored him as he grabbed his gear, quickly putting it all back on. As he re-tied his mask, he turned to face them. His eyes were fierce today, sending a slight shiver through Don. "Leo, are you ok?" His voice was full of concern. Even if Leo had really hurt him, he would always love his brother dearly.

Leo stared a moment more before turning and exiting through the window once more, easily leaping down to the ground. His injuries hurt whenever he did something physical, but his mental pain far overrode those physical pains. It was bad enough that everyone was hurt by his weakness, but he had almost hurt Donnie with his own hands. It was unforgivable.

As Leo stood, he quickly headed towards the barn. Today he would train the pain away, learn how to live without it. He had already corrected the balance of missing part of his shell. The barn door swung almost all the way shut, leaving it open only in case of emergency. He instantly started training again, using the same dummy he had made many months ago after his first immense injury at the hands of the Shredder.

It was nearly night before anyone decided to check on him. Mikey once more hobbled out to the barn, moving as quietly as possible. When he entered, Leo didn't seem to notice. He knew it would make him mad, but he liked to just watch Leo train. The way he moved was a thing of beauty.

As the day had worn on, Leo had worked himself into a frenzy. At this point, he was starting to see images of Splinter, chastising and criticizing how he hadn't trained hard enough. He saw images of the Shredder killing his family and mocking him. He saw Karai, felt the blade slicing through his hide like butter. The blood as it poured forth. He was almost lost within his world of darkness as he leapt towards the Shredder, his hands wrapping around his throat.

The Shredder fought back, but he seemed far too feeble to do anything. After only a moment, he fell to the ground. Dead. An angry sigh escaped Leo. He had done it! The Shredder was dead by his hands! Only as he stood there panting did the realization dawn on him- strangling the Shredder should have no effect. He was an Utrom after all… The illusion his mind had created started to fade as he violently shook his head to clear it. When he looked down, he recoiled in horror. He had not been strangling the Shredder.

He had strangled Mikey.

"Mikey… Michelangelo!" He fell to his knees as his hand reached to feel for a pulse. He detected none. Tears of anger and self-hatred sprung to his eyes. He had killed his brother. His baby brother. His love. That was the last straw for him. He bent over his brother's body as he sobbed, his hands tightly holding the broken body before him. After only a moment, he sat back up. He firmly pressed his lips to Mikey's one last time before standing.

With severe determination, he grabbed a rope from a stall of the barn. He slung the coil over his shoulder firmly before marching out of the barn. He didn't know where to go, but he knew he could stay here. Doing it this close to the barn, to Splinter's grave… it was wrong. There were other ways, more violent and quicker ways of going about it. But he felt that he had left his brothers and master hanging in the balance, and he felt that his instinctual method was a cruel twist of Fate as it punished him one last time.

His sure feet carried him to a small outcropping. It was only about 10 feet off the ground, but it was more than enough. At the top was a large, sturdy oak tree. A single branch extended out over the drop, almost beckoning to him.

After a quick climb, he had reached the top. The tope was easy enough to secure on to the tree, and he felt a certain peace as he tied the final knot. Before he was to do it, however, he decided to meditate a bit on his actions. Therefore, he sat at the base of the tree, his eyes closing.

Don looked around the room, his eyes searching for something. "Hey, Raph, when was the last time you saw Mikey?" He knew that seeing Leo was rare, and he tried to not pry too much into his brother's life.

Raph looked up and searched as well. "That's a good question. I haven't seen the little knuckle-head for a few hours. Didn't he go down to talk to Leo?" As he finished the sentence, he felt a cold sense of dread creeping up on him. Instantly, Don was on his feet. It was late and the stars were out. There was no moon, making the night dark.

Raphael stumbled to a standing position, letting out a stream of curses as he felt his bones cry out in protest. Don's supporting arm was more than enough to get the pair downstairs and out to the barn. Don paused, his hand on the door. A sense of trepidation passed through him. What would they find? Raph was tired of waiting. He extended a leg and kicked, sending the door flying back. Inside, on the ground, lay Mikey.

Don and Raph hurried to his side, both falling to their knees. Don checked for a pulse before examining him. He noticed the bruising on his neck and instantly knew what happened. "Leo. He must have been hallucinating and… attacked him." Mikey groaned below them, and with a few prods, he came back to life.

"Mikey, are you ok? It's a wonder you're not dead. If you were a human, your trachea would have been crushed almost instantly. The amount of force he used-" Raph cut Don off with a hand on his shoulder.

"Now isn't the time, bro. Now is when we go find Leo and kick his ass! I mean, what the fuck? He coulda easily killed Mikey. No one messes with my bros, especially another one of 'em!" His eyes narrowed dangerously, his rage fueling him as he stood. It overrode the pain he felt as he turned his eyes towards Don. "Come on. Let's get going."

Don helped Mikey to a standing position, handing him his crutches. "Doesn't Casey have a four-wheeler or something? It normally holds one, sometimes two, but it better be able to hold 3." Even Don was turning angry as he spoke. He strode to the side of the barn, searching for the vehicle he sought.

It was under a tarp, which was easily removed. The three of them piled on as Don started the engine. He roared forward, the side doors flying open from the impact. They had no time to fret over the little things. They had to find their brother. Don whipped out his shell cell, hoping that Leo had it with him. A small beep signaled that he had at least taken it from the property. "He may not have it with him," he whispered, "but he at least took it. That's a good start…" It was about a mile out, in a small area with few trees around it.

It was only about a five-minute drive. It would have been faster if there were fewer obstacles. When the trio arrived, they all piled off the machine. Only a large tree sat atop the hill, but that's where the signal originated. The large, creaking tree sent a shiver of dread through Don as he sighed. His straightened his shoulders and, supporting Raph, started up the hill. Mikey followed, a bit of fear starting to course through his veins as well. Raph only felt rage.

As they approached, the sounds of their footfalls reached Leo. He had only risen a moment earlier to attach the rope to his own neck, securing the noose. All it would take would be a step off the edge and it would all end. The noise, however, made him pause.

He peered around the edge of the tree, his dark silhouette blending into that of the tree. The night was dark, but the shapes moving towards him were unmistakable. His breath caught as he saw that there were 3 of them- and one was on crutches. "Mikey?" he whispered. As the trio approached, it became evident that all 3 of them were perfectly alive. His heart fluttered as he moved to the side more. The rope remained out of sight of the three below for the moment, and it was forgotten by the one who it held in its clutches.

Raph's eyes narrowed at the sight of Leo. "That bastard…" He raised his voice and pointed. "How dare you hurt Mikey! What the hell, Leo? Don't give me a bullshit reason, neither! Get down here so I can kick your ass!" He shook his fist up at his brother, a growl emitting from his throat. Don turned to Raph and hushed him. He opened his mouth to speak, but Mikey beat him to it. His voice was quiet, but the wind carried it up to their leader.

"Leo? I… I want to help you… I mean, you scared me… But, I love you and I want to help you… Please. I know everything has been hard on you, and hell, we're all messed up from it. But come back to me, Leo…" He stared up at his brother, his friend, his lover. His blue eyes glistened with unshed tears as he slowly started climbing the small hill. Raph and Don followed, but they lagged behind their youngest.

Leo took a step towards him.

His foot landed on a loose piece of rock that tumbled away from beneath him. He instantly remembered the rope around his neck, but by that time, it was too late. His feet scrabbled for purchase; his hands clawed at the rope and his swords. But it was all in vain. The rope snapped taught as the heavy body attached to it reached the bottom of the length.

The other three were frozen for no longer than a heartbeat before they began racing up the hill. Their own pains were forgotten as they ran, hoping to save their brother in time. Don reached him first. He reached down to grab one of Leo's swords, pulling it from the sheath and slicing the sword. Leo fell the last few feet, crashing to a heap on the ground below. Broken bones would be dealt with later. _If there is a later…_

The trio scrambled down the embankment towards the still form of their brother. Raph stayed back a few feet, letting the others move ahead. Mikey instantly fell by Leo's side, his hands hesitantly grabbing Leo's face. "Leo? Leo, hey, wake up…" Tears began to form in the corner of his eyes, threatening to overflow any minute.

Don slowly knelt down and placed his fingers on Leo's neck. He felt for a breath, watched for his chest to rise. A shudder wracked his body as he held in a sob. He couldn't bring himself to say it, instead opting to stand and move to Raphael. The red banded turtle pulled his brother into a tight embrace, the sobs finally coming. Though Raph had never been close to Leo outwardly, they had a special bond that the others wouldn't understand. This brought tears to the eyes of the hothead as he buried his face in Don's neck.

Mikey watched as Don moved away, his head starting to shake frantically. "No, no, no, this can't be happening!" He turned back to Leo, shaking him gently as the tears began to come. Leo, Leo please! Come back… come back to me! Leo!" Mikey collapsed onto Leo's chest as his sobs echoed through the still trees around them.

Raph and Don were both heartbroken by their brother's cries, and they moved towards him. They pulled him away from Leo, using force to accomplish this. They all sat there, in the dirt and among the stones, as they cried. Their brother, their leader, was dead. Their master had been killed. Who would they follow now? What would happen to their family?

Could they even go on?

Alright, that was severely depressing. I almost cried while writing it.  
*edit*- I cried while re-reading it.  
Yes, the ending was abrupt and random. I don't like endings.  
For those of you that like drama but happier endings, just read onto the second chapter- it's an alternate ending!


	2. Alternate Ending

This is the second ending! The first paragraph is exactly the same as it was in the original story, just as a point of entrance for the second ending to begin.

"Leo? I… I want to help you… I mean, you scared me… But, I love you and I want to help you… Please. I know everything has been hard on you, and hell, we're all messed up from it. But come back to me, Leo…" He stared up at his brother, his friend, his lover. His blue eyes glistened with unshed tears as he slowly started climbing the small hill. Raph and Don followed, but they lagged behind their youngest.

Leo took a step towards Mikey, a smile on his face. He had forgotten about the rope, but the step brought it to the attention of the 3 below. Their faces were of mixed emotion, but all of them turned to horror as the rock beneath Leo's feet crumbled. His own eyes widened as he reached up to grab the rope and save himself, but the fall was too fast and disorienting. He only had a few feet to fall, but it seemed like a much farther and slower fall than he had anticipated. It also ended with him crashing to the ground in a heap.

His eyes wandered up above him. Had he measured the rope wrong? No, he had double checked. Was this his spirit form? Was he to look up and see the mangled form of his own body, dangling from the tree? If it was, then spirits must bleed easily, because he was covered in bruises and cuts from his plummet. When he looked up, however, he saw only one thing- Raph's sai was embedded into the trunk of the tree. At the last minute, he had shoved Don to the side and thrown his blade, slicing the rope rather cleanly. A few fibers had been ripped from Leo's weight, which explained why his throat hurt so badly.

He only had a moment to sit up and collect himself before he was thrown to the ground once more. Mikey had launched himself off the side of the hill towards Leo, landing squarely on his target. Tears were streaming down his face as he spoke. "Leo! You are n-never allowed t-to worry me again!" Mikey looked up and tried to muster up a glare. "Do you hear me?" He pulled Leo as close as he could, sobbing onto his shoulder.

Raph and Don made their way down to the pair. Raph stopped behind Leo, reaching out and smacking him in the head. He expected a retort, but Leo's voice was full of grief. "I'm sorry. I didn't think you all wanted me around since I had officially snapped." A few tears began to leak from his own eyes as he held Mikey tightly, gently stroking and patting his shell to calm him down.

He felt another hand hit his head, but this time it was Don. It was a surprise to say the least. "What the fuck were you thinking, Leo! We love you- you're our brother! We would have worked through it all with you, everything! The Shredder, our father, your PTSD or whatever the hell you want!" He was also crying at this point, and he fell to his knees. Raph couldn't stand on his own, so he came down as well.

Don had sufficiently snuggled up to the side of Leo, putting an arm around both of his brothers tightly. "Never do that again, Leonardo, or I will kill you!" A smirk crossed Raph's face at Don's remark. He settled in between Leo and Don, turning to his leader.

"I'm not gonna lie- I like it when you're less Fearless an' perfect." The joking light in his eyes faded as he spoke his next words. "But you're still my bro, and I protect my bros. So don't do anything stupid, k?" He wasn't actually crying, but the hint of tears in his eyes made Leo lean into his embrace.

The brothers sat there, under the old creaking tree in the middle of the night. The wind floated over them as they all stood, Don supporting Raph and Leo supporting Mikey. They clambered onto the poor four-wheeler, hoping that Casey wouldn't mind if it broke from their weight. The engine roared to life and they set off for home, heading back to the rest of their family.

So. Once again, bad ending. But it's definitely happier!... And much more cheesy.


End file.
